Etiquette for holiday open house?

17 December 2019, 09:02 AM

Weekday or weekend, afternoon or evening, I think of holiday gatherings of being festive and would offer both wine and non-alcoholic beverages. Even holiday brunches in the late morning can feature mimosas or Bloody Marys.

But I don't think it's a deal breaker either way. Everyone can live without the booze.

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We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love… and then we return home. - Australian Aboriginal proverb

Bazootiehead-in-training

17 December 2019, 09:22 AM

ShiroKuro

quote:
But I don't think it's a deal breaker either way.

Well, I guess we'll find out. Like, if we have a second event and no one comes... :P

17 December 2019, 09:34 AM

wtg

It's impossible to please everyone.

We made a conscious decision to limit our beverages to a couple of kinds of soft drinks (one diet, one regular), coffee, and red and white wines.

We had one guest who, after surveying the beverage selection, asked if we had some scotch. We lied and said no. He wouldn't back off and kept asking for some type of hard liquor. We held our ground politely and he finally relented.

He was otherwise a dear sweet man and we remained friends until his passing a few years ago.

quote:
Originally posted by ShiroKuro:
quote:
But I don't think it's a deal breaker either way.

Well, I guess we'll find out. Like, if we have a second event and no one comes... :P

It will be their loss. But I doubt that would happen.

17 December 2019, 11:54 AM

Nina

quote:
Originally posted by ShiroKuro:
quote:
I have a question about no alcohol.

Can I ask why that rule? I know people who won’t serve alcohol for religious reasons, but I’m always surprised when I go to an adult party but I can’t sip a glass of wine.

Do you expect a glass of wine even at an event that starts at 1:30 in the afternoon?

Also, note, I didn't say no alcohol is allowed in our house. If people bring alcohol, I'll give them a glass. But we don't drink and would have no idea what to buy etc.

Do you also expect vegetarians to offer meat?

I wouldn't expect a glass of wine at a 1:30 event, but I wouldn't be surprised. I wouldn't be surprised if there were no alcohol, either. I'm a guest, I go with the flow.

As for the vegetarian thing, I don't see the equivalence. I eat meat, but I offer a vegetarian option at parties as a matter of course.

I guess my view is that if someone wants to invite me over, give me free food, good conversation, and friendship, I'm good to go with whatever menu is presented.

Your party will be fab.

17 December 2019, 12:05 PM

wtg

quote:
Originally posted by Nina:
I guess my view is that if someone wants to invite me over, give me free food, good conversation, and friendship, I'm good to go with whatever menu is presented.

Your party will be fab.

Word.

17 December 2019, 12:06 PM

piqaboo

If I had a recovering alcoholic living in my home, my parties would not serve alcohol. If I were vegetarian for moral/ethical reasons, my parties would not serve meat. If I insist everyone who enters washes their hands, I'll have installed a sink at the front entrance, and if I want no outdoor shoes, I'll copy SK's wording on the invitation and/or provide shoe covers.
I liked the advance warning - that spares someone from having to find a place to sit whilst removing their laceup tall boots, or such. We know to wear easy shoes, to bring our own indoor shoes if we have such a thing, etc.

As said, its a party! Eat, drink, be merry!

17 December 2019, 02:46 PM

ShiroKuro

Thanks y'all, hopefully my guests will have the same approach!

17 December 2019, 04:24 PM

piqué

I tell people to bring their own beverages. Serving wine for a small gathering is fine, but we can't afford to buy a case of it for a large group. And I dont keep hard liquor in the house. I live with a recovering alcoholic and he is just fine with having alcohol and drinkers in the house. We usually have an open bottle that I enjoy by myself.

17 December 2019, 05:17 PM

ShiroKuro

In retrospect I could have written something like “we will have coffee, tea and desserts” I. The invitation ... maybe I’ll do that next time.

Now to figure what exactly to write on the sign to put on the piano...

Funny that I’m doing that before making the dessert menu! Priorities!!! :P

17 December 2019, 05:57 PM

Nina

How about "Keep your carp and your dirty mitts off my piano!"

17 December 2019, 10:40 PM

Steve Miller

It’s an open house, IMHO. It’s not a formal dinner.

I’d put out what you’re comfortable with and ask guests to follow the rules of the house. If that doesn’t work for some they’re free to go after sampling the crudités. Put out a few Japanese delicacies and you may find various dietary preferences disappear. No one will turn down the cookies.

It’s supposed to be fun.

Enjoy!

17 December 2019, 10:45 PM

Steve Miller

BTW, the best regional specialty I had while in SC and maybe the best regional specialty I’ve ever had anywhere is Italian Cream Cake. There is nothing like it anywhere else, as far as I can tell.

I made one when I got home and it was a buttload of work but turned out perfectly. Get one at a bakery and set it out. No one will care about vegetarian entrees after that.

Let ‘em eat cake!

19 December 2019, 10:16 AM

QuirtEvans

quote:
Originally posted by piqaboo:
If I had a recovering alcoholic living in my home, my parties would not serve alcohol. If I were vegetarian for moral/ethical reasons, my parties would not serve meat. If I insist everyone who enters washes their hands, I'll have installed a sink at the front entrance, and if I want no outdoor shoes, I'll copy SK's wording on the invitation and/or provide shoe covers.
I liked the advance warning - that spares someone from having to find a place to sit whilst removing their laceup tall boots, or such. We know to wear easy shoes, to bring our own indoor shoes if we have such a thing, etc.

As said, its a party! Eat, drink, be merry!

Exactly. House rules. At the same time, giving people notice of house rules is polite.