Sending my best to you all as you move forward into the future.

quote:

Whether or not it’s in everyone’s best interests it’s still hard.

This. Hugs to you, Jon. Glad you are on the far side of the rupture, and wishing all three of you only the best for future happiness and harmony.

Your post is a reminder, too, that there's still a lot that goes on in our lives that isn't online.

Sorry to hear it didn’t work out, Jon.

Glad to hear you’re still friendly.

I'm sorry for whatever stresses must have led up to this decision, but it sounds like they're very much in the past and that you're much happier in the present.

I congratulate you for the deft way you and Rachel are handling the co-parenting. I know all too well how it can go the other way. You both deserve kudos because I know both parents have to be on the same page about their kid's priorities.

Can NOT do it if only one parent is for it, however much they try. Won't describe an example of how terrible it can be for the children and wanting-to-be cooperative parent, when there is absolute opposition.

A sad example of how it can fail is this. I was planning a book called "Relafriends" intended to describe the relationship between divorced parents. It was to help kids, as I thought they must have trouble figuring out how their "blood" family is related through them even though they aren't otherwise kin. (I don't think kids, especially young ones, ever grasp the purely legal construct of divorce.)

It never got off the ground.

Good to know the three of you have adjusted and that things are working.

I’m sorry. I’ve rewritten this post multiple times (as a child of divorce) but I keep erasing it. It’s hard all the way around. You get through as best you can and move on, I’m glad you are trying to do what is best for your son. ♥️

quote:

Originally posted by Piano*Dad:
Old news to you.

My first thought was "I'm really sorry to hear about this," and then, of course, I realized that separating is often the optimal course for all parties. So, my "sorry about this" is the general and abstract, "I'm sorry things worked out this way, or needed to work out this way, or, oh heck, talking about it is so complicated ..."

You two experienced a lot together, shared a lot.

Likewise. I'm sorry it happened. Whether it's for the best or not, I cannot say. But it's an awful process to go through, even if it's the correct outcome.

quote:

Originally posted by Doug:
Having the houses that close together sounds like a great set up!

That was actually a condition of our marital settlement agreement. The lawyers drafted it to say that we had to live within 50 miles of each other. I struck that and said we had to live in the same town, so the kids could take the bus to either house. I also added that, if someone left the town, the other spouse would get full custody.

The lawyers told me that was unenforceable, but I said I didn't care ... if my ex signed it, she'd know she agreed to it.

And we lived in the same town until both kids graduated high school, then we both left.

My brother had the same clause in their divorce agreement. Eventually they both moved but it lasted a while.