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16 May 2022, 06:30 PM
wtg
Oops
quote:
Originally posted by AdagioM:
Memory care is a big step, beyond Assisted Living. Sounds like things were *really* bad over there.

I hope the great-grandson is doing okay.


Yes, a very big step.

The little boy's mother is 23, unemployed and not looking for work, and living with a man who abuses her (not the little boy's father). She dumped the kid at great-grandma and great-grandpa's house shortly after he was born and only stopped to visit occasionally. She had him for a while after the first DCFS episode in October; the little guy was two. She complained about how tired she was chasing after him all the time.

After the broken arm episode a few months ago we heard that the little boy's father was in the picture after being absent for the first couple of years of his life; the kiddo was with him for an extended time recently. I don't know what's happened since.

It would seem his future is very much up in the air. Frowner


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We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love… and then we return home. - Australian Aboriginal proverb

Bazootiehead-in-training



16 May 2022, 06:40 PM
Nina
I assume DCFS is in the picture again...? at least I would hope so, since it appears he may not have a suitable relative willing to take over. How sad.

Actually, the entire story is sad. Memory care is clearly the right move, but that doesn't wipe out years of abuse and drama, which the daughter is also dealing with. Breaking that chain is hard. I hope the grandson is the one who gets out of the cycle.
16 May 2022, 07:03 PM
ShiroKuro
WTG, I don't think I was tracking all those details, esp. about the grandson. I'm sorry, it sounds like a nightmare for all involved.

I hope each of them gets the help they need. I also hope that things are calmer in the neighborhood now as well.


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17 May 2022, 11:11 AM
AdagioM
It sounds like it’s a great-grandson, not a grandson. I wonder where his grandparents are? I wonder if they would be willing to raise this poor child. Maybe not, since it sounds like they had not stepped in when great-grandson was dumped here.


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17 May 2022, 11:45 AM
wtg
Yes, the little boy is my neighbor's great-grandson.

The 23 year old mom of the little guy has an 18 year old brother with severe cerebral palsy. He is unable to stand or walk, and does not speak. He lives with his parents in their condo. His sister, the 23 year old, was living at home until her police rap sheet got so long her parents threw her out.

The maternal grandmother isn't in the best of health either, so taking care of another child is more than she and her husband can handle. My neighbors took care of the boy with CP from the time he was an infant until he was too heavy to lift, maybe age 13 or so. Their house is a split level and the stairs were a major obstacle.

The 23 year old was drinking, smoking, and doing drugs while she was pregnant with the little guy. My neighbors took him in after he was born to care for him but he was stuck in a house with no real opportunities to interact with anyone besides two people developing dementia and not in good physical shape. They couldn't get him out for exercise because he would get away from them all the time. I caught the kid a couple of times when neither great-grandma, nor grandma when she came to visit, could catch him when he took off like kids that age do.

So at age two and a half, the kiddo still isn't talking, and his only form of communication is to scream (mostly when great-granny is around him). I'm guessing he's going to have issues moving forward based on his early life experiences.

I don't know about the other side of the great-grandson's family, except that the kid's biological father stepped out of the picture when he found out his girlfriend was pregnant. I was surprised to hear that the kiddo was staying with him recently when DCFS stepped in, so maybe there's hope that the other side of the family will become involved.


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We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love… and then we return home. - Australian Aboriginal proverb

Bazootiehead-in-training



17 May 2022, 03:24 PM
Steve Miller
It’s all very sad. Frowner


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Life is short. Play with your dog.

17 May 2022, 08:32 PM
markj
I just read through all of this.

It is very sad and quite horrific for you and your neighbors, wtg.